Kümme aastat varem - 30/08/99 - 05/09/99

ancientboy's weekly notes. 30/08/99 - 05/09/99.

In many ways very important week for myself. Some situations and happenings guided me to serious thinking about my own life. I tried to found out what I'm doing right now and what I want to do in future, find my own preferences. I hope that I can say after five or ten years, THIS was the important moment when I made decision, a right one. We'll see...

It was also something else. Renovating the house was continued, now we have walls up and hope to put it under the roof again in a week. Monotonous work-routine followed with very few brighter moments. On Friday I spent 19 hours on the road, driving through southern Estonia, making some deals and trying to find new business contacts. Had normal results. Half Saturday was spent with solving other's problems, sadly not very successfully, I have to say.

1st September was the first schoolday here. I watched the kids, marching by my house, and suddenly realised that summer is over. Again. And I didn't noticed how it flew away, it was like yesterday when I looked through the same window at boys, wearing short pants as a sign of warm spring. And it was really four months ago and I don't know how I spent these days. Just the weird and probably empty feeling, best described with the words of somebody else:

Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then the one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking
And racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in the relative way, but you're older
And shorter of breath and one day closer to death

Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation in the English way
The time is gone the song is over, thought I'd something more to say

(Time, Pink Floyd)