Kümme aastat varem - 20/03/00 - 26/03/00

20/03/2000 - 26/03/2000.

As said already in previous entry, week and spring both started in Pärnu. Monday night I was back home again only to find out that tiles for the roof were still somewhere on the way (in fact they didn't arrived before Thursday) and the situation pretty much messy. At least parts of new chimney were here and so it was basically possible to do some preparing works.

Tuesday flew by so fast that I can't recall even now what exactly happened then. Wednesday K. started his business-trip abroad for a few days (that I remember) and I irritated my employee (as she's very much into all kind of spiritual things) with phrase "two spirited". Quoting J. McRee (Mac) Elrod (from Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada): "In British Columbia "two spirited" is used by First Nations gays to refer to themselves. They say it has reference to the honoured place gays held in First Nations society before the arrival of Europeans." Interesting indeed.

Thursday I had a sad meeting when I saw one long-time customer of mine after almost a year and realised how much illness can change the people. A human wreck was all which had left from once shiny and proud lady... I felt pity and I felt sorry and I don't know why exactly. Was this because of her helpless condition or because of the fortune-teller's sight she gave me, remembering the mortality of humans. Cruel life. And, memento mori.

I think, this had such a strong influence on me also because of book I was just finishing at that time, "To a friend who didn't save my life" (or something like that in English) by Hervé Guibert, a very sad documental book about AIDS, life and death.

On Friday I started another book, "Memoirs" by Tennessee Williams and day after day I become envy him more and more, not because of his happy and interesting life but mainly because of his gift of writing. His elegance of putting the words together is simply breathtaking.

On same day a friend of mine visited me at home and, music fan as he is, always checking my CD-s, he discovered a disc he hadn't noticed before and asked me with enthusiasm in his voice: "What's that? I see you're having some new albums!" And I answered: "Oh, that's a collection of songs, performed by one American Gay Choir who visited Tallinn last year..." Before I could finish my short line, the disc was back on shelf, he had an old copy of Q-magazine in his hands and changed the topic of conversation. So it seems, this scandalous disc (a gift from K., by the way) was too hot for his hands :-)

Saturday K. arrived back to Estonia and at last we could have some longer talks again. He did phoned me every day (and night!) during his trip but due to killer-costs these calls were much shorter than I would've like. So I stayed on quiet street in front of my shop on Saturday and enjoyed both the warm sun and my man on the other end of line.

Sunday started with home-war because my family had decided few days before that it's the day to cut the old wood we're having next to our landhouse. So they'd made a decision but didn't remembered mention that to me before Sunday morning. And however I was fighting against it, in the end I'd lost all my arguments and grumpy me sat in the car.

Four hours of hard work gave us a mountain of sawn wood for wintertime and for me personally two painful toes. I got hit with one piece of wood and however luckily all bones are okay, my poor toes have now a dramatic dark-blue colour. No make-up needed when they would like to have a role of monster in some cheap horror-movie.